More Gas

The lesson learned from the Great Gas Project (still on-going) is that our documentation was woefully out of date.

“Our documentation.” Read that, “I lost track of stuff. It’s my fault. There, I told the entire Internet! Happy now?”

Anyway. Blame it on the paperless society but over time we put our bill on auto-pay and our statements on some email account lost to obscurity.

Today I resolved to get things in order. First, a trip to the Gas Service Company (“service” is our middle name!) website.

I tried to login using a variety of email addresses and passwords but nothing worked. In desperation I tried the oldest email address in recorded history and several tumblers fell into place. Then I keyed in the oldest password in recorded history and the vault creaked open.

But not completely open. There was a toll to be paid.

“Welcome valued customer! Since you haven’t accessed this site in over 12 months we’ll have to ask you a few security questions before you may pass. Press OK to continue.

OK.

Question 1: What is your horse’s name?

Answer: I don’t have a horse.

Incorrect.

Answer: Silver

Incorrect.

Answer: Sea Biscuit

Incorrect. Three attempt failure. Next question.

Question 2: What is your second cousin twice removed mother’s maiden name?

Answer: Who?

Incorrect.
Answer: Smith

Incorrect.

Answer: Jones

Incorrect. Three attempt failure. Final quesiton.

Question 3: What is Junior Sample’s phone number?

(Ohh, ohh, I knew this one.)

Answer: br549

Incorrect. Answer is case sensitive.

Answer: BR549

Incorrect.

Answer: Br 549

Incorrect. Three attempt failure. Your account has been locked. To unlock your account call the Gas Service Company Customer Service line. Thank you and have a nice day.

“Well, isn’t that special,” I thought. Looking through the website I found a link to Customer Service and a toll-free number. I dialed it.

Welcome to the Gas Service Company Customer Service service. For English, press 1.

1

Please listen carefully as our options have changed. To report a leak press 1, for billing enquiries press 2, for rate plans press 3, to reset your password press 4, for all other inquiries press 0.

4

To reset your password press 1, for all other enquiries press 0.

1

Enter your account number followed buy the pound sign.

*********#

Enter your street address followed by the pound sign.

****#

Enter your phone number followed by the pound sign.

**********#

Enter your account number for verification followed by the pound sign.

*********#

To reset your password confirm by pressing 1.

1

Our business office is currently closed. Please call back during regular business hours Monday through Friday, 7 AM to 9 PM Eastern Standard time. Thank you have have a good day.

Slowly I turned...