Monday, January 16, 2006

Google’s Got You Covered

I can barely remember what life was like before cell phones and Google. Actually, I can: I spent more time looking up stuff in books and being lost. Not really lost as in Lost lost, just in the wrong place which is just as bad; the “wrong place” being not the place my wife was.

I digress.

Here I am in sunny Allen, Texas. Ha! You thought that previous posting was a joke. So did I. I really am in Allen, Texas and it’s a fine town.

The first thing I did when I got into my hotel room was unpack the PowerBook and hook it up to the Internet cable. I guess a close third after cell phones and Google is hotels with Internet connections. Especially FREE Internet connections. Imagine that! My $200 a night room has FREE Internet. I am a King.

So, I hooked up the PowerBook, brought up Google and went to Google Maps where I typed in “krogers, allen, texas” and faster than the Sackmeiser could bag a can of Turkey ‘n’ Giblets, up came a map of local Kroger’s stores. The closest Kroger’s was on the corner of Allen Heights and Bethany.

I needed to pick up a few things: bagel crisps, beef jerky and a box of sushi. I can tell you for sure, you can’t get bagel crisps just anywhere. I called my wife on the cell phone from Kroger’s.

“They got sushi in Allen, Texas?”

“Yeah-huh, they do! They got cheese balls on rice and minnows on rice. And some crickets. Never seen that before, but it looks good.”

Also, I needed to find a Mexican restaurant for dinner and using Google I found La Finca right there on Bethany within field goal distance of the hotel. How conveeeeeeeenient!

Soon I was back in the car and in short order had completed my shopping, enjoyed a fine Camarones A La Diabla (with Crow Poblano) and was back in my Internet saturated room for a night of surfing and listening to the chaperones of a middle school girl’s gymnastics team shouting “Don’t jump on the beds! Don’t jump on the beds!”

Allen, Texas. Just north of Dallas, hardly even out of Dallas. Founded in the 1800’s by Ebenezer Allen, a railroad promoter. Old Eb promoted railroads by hauling great, long flatcars piled high with gold bullion, gleaming in the sun.

The first train robbery was in Allen, Texas in 1878, committed by Sam Bass and his gang.

Bankrupt, Ebenezer emigrated to England where, embittered by his loss, he founded an accounting firm, developed a reputation for meanness, then, suddenly, one Christmas Eve, turned over a new leaf and learned to keep the spirit of Christmas like no man before or since.

As for Sam Bass and the Gang, they did some time in jail but Sam emerged to start a chain of Pro Fishing Shops and made a second fortune as a motivational speaker.

And that’s all the news from Allen, Texas. Next stop: Tinkerbell.

6 comments:

Bret said...

Don't do it, Bill. There are always options other than Tinkerbell. You'll always have Whimsy. You could head toward Edgy, maybe even detour to Dystopian. But there is no honor in Tinkerbell.

I think Allen put something in my salt. I'm feeling a bit kmqaxsiy, and not just because Blogger told me to.

Tom said...

Mmmmm, those bagel crisps you got were good! So was the peppered beef jerky you bought. Thanks for the snacks you left in the car Bill. Thanks for the wine also! Cheers to you!

Foo said...

Too bad you didn't call. Since you already know where La Finca is, I could have suggested you meet me next door at Ted & Larry's for a couple brews on me.

kilowatthour said...

i gotta get me some of that texas sushi. cheese balls on rice? delectable!

Pammer said...

I'd like to know what has brought you to Allen, Texas? It's not that gymnastics thing, is it? I'm having a hard time picturing you in a unitard.

Antique Mommy said...

I used to live and work in Allen when there was country side between Allen and Plano. There was no sushi in the county in those days except at the bait store.