Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Astros Smastros

I'm sorry, but I'm not a baseball fan.

OK, I'll pack my bags and you can send me to Siberia, so long as they don't play baseball there.

Don't get me wrong. I don't have anything against baseball, per se, it's just that I'm not a fan. I don't have a favorite team. I don't have a favorite player.

I just don't give a rat's ass about baseball.

My ambivalence towards baseball may stem from the pick-up games we had as a kid where I was the last player chosen. Yes, I was the Charlie Brown of my neighborhood, doomed to play the outfield forever.

Once we had an injury and the Coach asked if I could play Second Base. I lept at the chance. Second Base was my ideal position because I was fast, but I couldn't throw far. I was a disaster in the outfield. I was probably nearsighted at the time, too, which didn't help.

Anyway, I was brilliant at Second Base. I scored several outs and made a number of crucial plays. It was my finest moment. Then the Coach said that I was to go back to the outfield because the Second Base player was well. Coach told me that I was a good Second Base player but the other guy had started at second base and his parents sort of expected him to play that position and if I went back to Center Field where I would drop balls and be unable to throw them into the infield, well, that would help the team a whole lot.

So, I went out to Center Field and got yelled at a lot. I felt good, though, becuse I knew I was helping the team.

I sort of lost interest in baseball after that.

There was an article in the paper about a Houston team in some sort of play off. Are the Astros from around here?

I wouldn't know.


Anonymous said...

praise god, you don't like baseball.

From another near sighted, always picked last baseball hater. Maybe it's because I ran like a duck, maybe it's because I didn't care, I don't really know. I've given birth to a boy who feels the same way. His lack of enthusiasm for the sport has regularly annoyed his farsher.

Anonymous said...

okay, don't think I'm weird, (I am) but here I am again. I don't have time to look this whole site over right now, but I spotted a pic of an Ibook laptop. Is it a G4? I just bought one, i'm using it on this post. It's been super hard to convert, because not only am I a techno retard, but I was very used to Microsoft, and all things freezer upper. I still don't have it figured out, but I'm trying my best. Due to the fact that near as I can tell, only myself and 3 other people in my podunk town own one of these, I don't know who to ask for help, and I dearly hate calling the techincal hotline, or reading instruction books. those things are written for aliens. Anyway, I hope I don't regret this purchase, as I really couldn't afford it but if that windows thing froze up one more time I was going to do something to it that would not have been pretty.

Bente said...

I have almost the exact same baseball story except I was brought to short stop. It was great because I was finally doing a good job playing, but when I was sent back to the outfield it just plain sucked. I didn't go back the following year, but I was happy to know I was actually good at some part of the game.

Tom said...

Commie-pinko! If McCarthy was alive, you'd be in big trouble. I think the Astros are losing anyways...

schmims said...

I was always picked last even though I was good at sports. We moved to a new town and being the new fourth grader whose mom dressed her like a kindegardener, I was the dork no one wanted on their team. Kids are so mean!

Kristie said...

Bill, you are absolutely hysterical. I love your blog.

Shalee said...

I was always picked last. (I think being the shortest, least athletic may have had something to do with it, but I couldn't see that then.) If they didn't have to pick everyone, I would probably still be standing there on the side, hoping that someone would pick me now. I might have a better chance because kids usually pick an adult because they can usually do things better.

However, after I met my husband, I thought I would try out some sports with him. It turns out that I can play a lot of them as well or better (oh, I so hope he won't read this!) than him. (No I am not conceited, just enlightened.)

I have a killer golf drive (can't stand the game though), I can throw a football amazingly accurately, I love volleyball and I will hit a softball 4 out of 5 times. I think it has to do with learning how to keep my eyes open when I play...

I liked Center Field, though. It was a great place to catch some rays without having to bother with thinking about the game.