Monday, November 26, 2012

Airport Ride

Drove up to the airport today and that's always fun, especially in the misnamed "rush" hour which is anything but rushing.  But, it was worth the drive especially if you're trying to fly somewhere, although curbside pickup by the airplane would be pretty cool.  Just think how wide the streets would have to be!


It was a busy time at the airport with flights stacked up at 90-second intervals as far out as you could see and other flights taking off at (nearly) the same time.  Huge planes glided over seeming to hover in the air as they banked over the city heading to Who Knows Where.  There was even a monster jet crossing the road with passengers waving at us as we drove under.

Reminded me how I once wanted to be a NASCAR driver.  That was a short-lived fantasy!  Next to that, though, would be Airport Bus Driver.  Now, that's got to be a fun job!  Driving a big ole rattling bus at breakneck speeds along narrow airport roads, cutting off other drivers and buses, parking where you shouldn't park, stopping for no reason, driving by passengers for no reason and the best part - getting paid!

I would want one of the outrageously painted buses like the yellow one with black spots and I'd hang fuzzy dice from the little used rearview mirror.  I'd put a tip jar on the dashboard seeded with a few 20's just to give my passengers an idea of my expectations, and I'd always start my run by shouting, "Y'all hang on!  I don't want to lose any of y'all out the windows like last week!"

Yeah, well, another fantasy.  But, it's not really the exciting driving that really gets my blood going about being an Airport Bus Driver.  Nope, it's the cool driver's seat!  Have you seen that thing?  It's like a giant cushion on hydraulics that is totally bump proof.  You can hit a speed bump at 90 miles an hour and that seat will just ride you through it.

So, what's I'm designing is an Airport Bus Driver simulator.  Right in my garage.  I think I can take the passenger seat out of the Lexus (nobody rides there, anyway) and mount it on four paint shakers.  Strap myself in, throw the switch and I'm on my way to Terminal E!

Y'all hang on, ya hear?

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